Get a grip...
I need to get a grip.
My mind seems to be swirling lately. I'm worried. I'm worried about a lot. And I need to stop. My mother worries. I usually don't. Gosh...this is where my husband would just go ahead and call me "Renae" (my mother's name). He thinks I'm just like her. I don't want to be my mother when it comes to worrying. She worries about everyone and everything. It wakes her up at night! I can usually keep my mind in check...not letting my worrying thoughts consume me. Throughout the years, I've had different worries...
When I was younger, I worried if I'd ever get a job after college. I worried if my boyfriend would EVAH propose. I worried about having enough money to make my car payment, about finding an apartment in Massachusetts that we could afford, and if I'd ever be able to get pregnant after I miscarried my first pregnancy.
My 30's brought different issues. I worried about my 3 year old son that could scale an 8 foot chainlink fence and wondered if he would ever settle down enough to learn how to read. I worried about my 9 year old son that couldn't make a friend when he was "the new kid" in school. I worried if my daughter would ever be strong and independent when she came home crying about that girl who told her who she could play with and who she couldn't.
Lately, I'm still worrying about my family. But the worries seem so far out of my control. I worry that my new grandson won't know me. I worry that he won't love me. And I worry that I'll love him so much it'll hurt that he lives 2000 miles away from me. I worry about my missionary son...about his future. He will pretty much be starting over at college when he comes home next year. That can be overwhelming. I worry about my parents and what their "end of days" will look like. I worry about cheerleading. Boyfriends. My daughter's future career. Ugh. There's too much. Get a grip.
I'm hoping that by blogging about my worries, I'll be able to tuck all these thoughts in to the back of my mind. Or maybe even get rid of them through my keyboard and be done with all this craziness. The one thought that comes to my mind as I re-read some of my worries from my younger years is this: I did get a job, albeit not a great one. My boyfriend proposed...sort of. I got pregnant 3 more times that ended with sweet babies and not miscarraiges. My oldest son not only learned how to read, but is studying chemical engineering. My middle son is loved by many friends who understand his humor and love to be around him. At her young age of 15, my daughter has experienced so much girl drama that it rarely brings her to tears anymore. Just being able to see success out of my deepest concerns is my Sweet Fringe Benefit today.
Outfit of the Day: Anthropologie golden yellow drapey cardigan, Converse (Target) cream ruffle shell, Liz Claiborne (JCPenny) black slim ankle pants, Vince Camuto shooties, Emaack Designs Quartz double strand necklace. It was 98 degrees today...but in my office, this cardigan helped me feel toasty! And I just love the loose flowy fit of it. It's unlike anything I have.
A little bit of worry is okay to keep me focused on what is important. Too much worry paralyzes me. I'm going to pray to feel at peace over these thoughts that plague me...
Nanette
My mind seems to be swirling lately. I'm worried. I'm worried about a lot. And I need to stop. My mother worries. I usually don't. Gosh...this is where my husband would just go ahead and call me "Renae" (my mother's name). He thinks I'm just like her. I don't want to be my mother when it comes to worrying. She worries about everyone and everything. It wakes her up at night! I can usually keep my mind in check...not letting my worrying thoughts consume me. Throughout the years, I've had different worries...
When I was younger, I worried if I'd ever get a job after college. I worried if my boyfriend would EVAH propose. I worried about having enough money to make my car payment, about finding an apartment in Massachusetts that we could afford, and if I'd ever be able to get pregnant after I miscarried my first pregnancy.
My 30's brought different issues. I worried about my 3 year old son that could scale an 8 foot chainlink fence and wondered if he would ever settle down enough to learn how to read. I worried about my 9 year old son that couldn't make a friend when he was "the new kid" in school. I worried if my daughter would ever be strong and independent when she came home crying about that girl who told her who she could play with and who she couldn't.
Lately, I'm still worrying about my family. But the worries seem so far out of my control. I worry that my new grandson won't know me. I worry that he won't love me. And I worry that I'll love him so much it'll hurt that he lives 2000 miles away from me. I worry about my missionary son...about his future. He will pretty much be starting over at college when he comes home next year. That can be overwhelming. I worry about my parents and what their "end of days" will look like. I worry about cheerleading. Boyfriends. My daughter's future career. Ugh. There's too much. Get a grip.
I'm hoping that by blogging about my worries, I'll be able to tuck all these thoughts in to the back of my mind. Or maybe even get rid of them through my keyboard and be done with all this craziness. The one thought that comes to my mind as I re-read some of my worries from my younger years is this: I did get a job, albeit not a great one. My boyfriend proposed...sort of. I got pregnant 3 more times that ended with sweet babies and not miscarraiges. My oldest son not only learned how to read, but is studying chemical engineering. My middle son is loved by many friends who understand his humor and love to be around him. At her young age of 15, my daughter has experienced so much girl drama that it rarely brings her to tears anymore. Just being able to see success out of my deepest concerns is my Sweet Fringe Benefit today.
A little bit of worry is okay to keep me focused on what is important. Too much worry paralyzes me. I'm going to pray to feel at peace over these thoughts that plague me...
Nanette
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What is the best Sweet Fringe Benefit of your age?